Same old...

Recently, I have been feeling like my life is one long routine that never changes. From the order I do stuff, like getting up in the morning, taking a shower, getting dressed, eating breakfast...It's the same thing every day. I go to work, I do the same thing all day every day at work, then I come home, and usually do the same thing week in week out after work. There's no variety in there at all. Is that just part of growing up? Or am I stuck in a rut right now? Don't get me wrong, on the whole I'm pretty happy with my life, I'm surrounded by great friends, have a good laugh and other than keeping the rent and bills paid have very little responsibility. I just yearn for a life where I can wake up in the morning and not have a clue what's going to happen that day, where I'm going to go, what I'm going to do. I'm not a planner at all, I just figure it leaves more room for disappointment when things don't out how you planned...Leave it all up to the last minute, be spontaneous! That's the way to be, but unfortunately this isn't a secure way to be. I need my job to pay my bills. So for the time being I'll survive in my unchanging routine, and wait for the day when nothing is planned!

Shadow Of A Star

Have you ever felt so lonely

You thought your heart would implode

Upon itself, never to be remade

Never to be made whole?

That's the way you made me feel

Last night, whilst you left me there

All by myself, so small, so insignificant

Just a background noise there to fill the silences

I talk to people, they just talk to you

They do not see me, or even hear me

All they want to do is watch you play

Never have an interest in what I have to say

That's the way they made me feel

Last night whilst you left me there

All by myself, so small, so insignificant

Just a background noise there to fill the silences

What can I do to make myself heard?

I try so hard to no avail

To them I'm just a shadow

Of the one who shines so bright

I thought them nice, so open and caring

But that night I realised it was all a lie

As I sat there all alone, staring into space

They didn't even notice when I started to cry

That's the way you made me feel

Last night whilst you left me there
All by myself, so small, so insignificant
Just a background noise there to fill the silences

There I was so totally alone

I though my heart would implode

My soul was heavy I could hardly move

And still I stand among the shadows

Hi there!

Hi everyone, once again I'm so sorry for the delay in posting here. But I think I'll be able to post a bit more regularly now that we have a computer back in the house.

So, a quick recap on the Life of Rach, Christmas was amazing. Spent it with my family in my sister's house, it snowed which topped off the holidays. Then came back up to Derby for New Year, which was spent hanging out with friends, good food and good wine. Then the week after that was my birthday. It was a great weekend as I got to catch up with an old Uni friend who had been travelling around the world for 6 months before hand. I hadn't seen him for a year though. We just went out and about on the town for the evening, catching up, chatting, dancing and drinking. It was so much fun! Then the Sunday was spent on the sofa watching TV before heading off to the cinema to watch Brokeback Mountain. It was the most amazing film I have seen for the longest time. I don't know why, but it affected me a way that no other film has done. All the way through the movie I was trying to work out whether it really was a good film, or whether I just though it was because I like cowboys, the scenery and America in general. And I came to the conclusion that it was. Ang Lee did a great job of the direction, keeping the audiences (well my) attention all the way through the sparse script and slow story. His method of showing the passing of 20 years was pure genius, as his subtle changes of fashion and architecture say everything the script does not. But the acting was the thing that really blew me away. Both Heath Ledger and Jake Gylanhaal play characters you would not expect them to play, and they do it so well. I was totally sucked into the film and the time just flew by. I cried so much, it was untrue. I am a bit of a sap when it comes to films, and I cry at most of them, but this one was different, I could have cried all the way through the credits, all the way home and then some more at home! I immediately went about reading everything I could find about it, and even went out and bought the book it was based on. Because it was based on a short story, Ang Lee had a lot of scope with the movie and could expand on it a lot. I was so impressed when I read the story, because I hate it when I read books of movies, and it's been changed. Whereas this one was exactly the same.....Every bit of dialogue was in there, word for word.

right that's enough of that one for the time being. Lets just say I enjoyed the movie eh?!

Welcome back to Rach's blog people, I promise to update more often!

Hope everyone is well, Take Care!

Welcome to the New Year

I know, I know, I'm a little late on this one! I apologise for the lack of blogging here recently, I've been so busy at work, that when I get home, the last thing I want to do is sit in front of a computer some more! I am thinking of buying a new computer (since my laptop died!!!) so that I can blog more regularly! I'll keep you posted on that one...

But really, I just wanted to say HAPPY NEW YEAR! I hope everyone's holiday celebrations were good, and that 2006 brings you all lots of happiness and good stuff!

Hope you're all well, and I apologise once again, I'll try to be more bloggy this year!

Have fun!